by Anti-Racist Parent columnist Tereza Topferova
Last month, ABC News reported on a study of elementary and high school students, aimed at finding out whether children use race to socially exclude other children from their groups.
The study of nearly 700 fourth, seventh, and 10th graders of different ethnic and racial backgrounds living in the mid-Atlantic region found that “children and adolescents who had friends from different ethnic backgrounds were significantly more likely to say it is wrong to exclude someone because of their race, citing unfairness or hurting the feelings of the excluded child as reasons.”
“In contrast,” the article continues, “students who reported few or no cross-race friendships were significantly less likely to view excluding someone on the basis of race as wrong. Their reasons were often based on a lack of familiarity, such as, ‘They won’t have much in common.’”
Specifically, “European-American children attending ‘all-white’ schools were more likely than European-American children attending ‘mixed ethnicity’ schools to use stereotypes when explaining why someone might not be friends with someone, or invite them home to their house, solely because of their race.”
This is interesting. At first glance, it makes sense. However, I wonder about the conclusions that can be drawn from this study. Some of the most enlightened white anti-racist activists whose work I read, respect, and learn from, grew up in very homogenous surroundings, comprising of almost only white people. Vegankid, for example, who is part of the Ally Work collective, grew up in a small town with only two families of color. It was Vegankid’s sexual identity and his experience as a Queer person that acted as a brigde for his developing of empathy for those affected by racism. You can read Vegankid’s Learning Empathy story here.
Like Vegankid, Rachel of Rachel’s Tavern, another brilliant anti-racist activist and blogger, grew up around all whites, and her parents, like Vegankid’s taught her to treat everyone with respect and dignity. In her piece, Racism and Empathy: Some of My Approximating Experiences, she remembers challenging her white classmates on their racism. For that, she was called a “nigger lover” and threatened. As a result of these experiences, she began to develop a sense of empathy towards people of color. She writes: “I am by no means saying I get everything. I just know what I felt like when these things were directed at me. I knew the fear, the powerlessness, the exasperation, and the anger that racism was creating in me. Because of these experiences (and others), I dedicated myself to fighting racism.”
I guess my thoughts on whether integration is really key to lessening racial prejudice in children are mixed. Of course, having friends of color inevitably leads to empathy for those affected by racism, however, maybe the logic in this study is faulty.
I think the failure is in the fact that racism among whites is rarely discussed. White children, in general, receive virtually no anti-racist education. White privilege allows whites to not have to think about race and racism unless directly confronted with it. White children who have friends of color are probably more likely to learn about racism and discuss it in their circles. But this doesn’t have to be the case.
As seen in the two stories above, it is completely possible to develop an anti-racist consciousness in a predominantly white environment.
I am by no means advocating segragation. What I am saying is that many people do not have a choice. They live where they live, they go to school where they go to school. Still, lack of a racially diverse environment doesn’t and shouldn’t have to be an indicator of the degree of race awareness and empathy.
Though I live in the whitest major city in the U.S., though I grew up in a predominantly white society, and though I am married to a white man with whom I have a white child, I feel a moral responsibility to work on helping to eliminate racism. Why couldn’t most white children develop the same kind of desire and turn a future study like this on its head? What’s stopping them? I am apt to think it’s the white adults in their lives who benefit from White Supremacy and white privilege too much to rock the boat. I don’t want to be one of those people and I am working very hard to counter, on the one hand, the reality reflected in this study and, on the other, the very stereotype of the bigoted, racist, and ignorant white person from Whiteville that this study perpetuates.
Tereza Topferova is a teacher, who has worked with both youth and adults, teaching English, Czech, speech, journalism, creative writing, workplace communication, and vocational education. She grew up in the Czech Republic and immigrated to the U.S. at age fourteen. She is a mother of a toddler and blogs at White Anti-Racist Parent.
I am white, but I was fortunate to grow up around people of different races, and I do think it matters. When someone makes a racist comment about in my hearing, it is more painful and personal for me than it would be if I didn’t have friends of different races.
I also remember traveling in Europe with an African-American friend and seeing how people stared at her, and I think I “got it” in a way I wouldn’t have if I had just read about racism or learned about it in school.
I know not everyone has a choice about where to live. But for me and my family, living in a racially diverse community has always been a priority. That’s not to say you can’t be anti-racist in an all-white community. But I do think that given a choice, we should choose to be around people of different races and model those friendships for our kids’ sake.
I also think that school segregation is no accident. And it perpetuates itself. None of us want our kids to go to a “bad school” but if white parents opt out of urban public schools, the result is de facto segregation, which makes the schools, and the problem of racism, even worse.
I don’t think your points here are at odds with the study as it is presented. But I think your interpretation of the results may read more into the study than is necessary.
“…the very stereotype of the bigoted, racist, and ignorant white person from Whiteville that this study perpetuates.”
– I don’t think the study perpetuates this idea. I think it simply states that with no point of reference for diversity, children will tend to quietly develop more bias. Given the integration of racism into the very structure of our social fabric, this is not surprising. The examples you give of white, anti-racist activists from homogeneous backgrounds gain their perspective on diversity from a disruption in that homogeneity. Be it parental values, or personal experience as “The Other”, it’s a matter of some aspect of identity breaking up the socio-cultural inertia. Otherwise, people tend to follow the path of least resistance.
Of course white people in Whiteville can be anti-racist advocates. But just as racism is learned, anti-racism must also be learned. There has to be some incentive coming from somewhere. Usually it comes from empathy, which tends to come from contact.
Atena
“…Treat everyone with respect and dignity”
This is the first step. What if there was no such word as “racism”? Would we still be concerned about these issues? I hope so.
I agree with Atena that empathy tends to come from contact, but on a more basic level, if we teach our children (and neighbors, etc.) to respect others, we’ve got the grounds for anti-racist behavior: “Uh, excuse me, but why are you treating someone with less than respect?”
The world is much more complicated, of course, but the grounding should be the same for all kids.
Sorry, but I found this post lacking.
I am not half the writer that most of the posters on this blog are, but here goes…
I do think that “white schools” contribute to racism, at least the passive kind, and that antiracist education in and of itself is not enough. I agree with Rachel that it puts a more personal sting in it when you hear comments that are hurtful to someone you know and care about, and that makes you more motivated to respond.
I am white and grew up in an almost exclusively white town in the Midwest. I literally know people who never saw a black person until they went to college. While I didn’t know many “bigots” (that is, not many people were blatantly throwing racial slurs around), I can’t think of anyone who was actively anti-racist either. People who are white and grow up in white towns basically get away with ignoring race and racism. They may internalize racism but they never deal with it. They can get through life without having to actually confront it ever. Maybe they’ll blush or feel a little uncomfortable when they receive shitty email forwards but that’s about it.
I think that antiracism training in schools is incredibly important, and at least as important in predominantly white schools as anywhere else. But if kids don’t personally know any (or few) people of color, that will be just another day in the classroom and will feel as irrelevant to them as stories about ancient Greece. They might know better how to answer “correctly” one of these surveys, but what they say and how they behave are still likely to be very different.
To Kathy:
If you’re going to comment on the post being lacking, it would be useful for you to explain why. Otherwise it appears to be un-constructive criticism.
I think empathy also comes from seeing yourself as somehow different from the mainstream. If you look like everyone else, like all the same things they do, and never have to question a comfortable life (especially if it’s very homogeneous!) then unless told otherwise it might not seem necessary to “worry” about developing an anti-racist consciousness.
That’s why I think those that grow up in a homogeneous environment are more aware of difference if they are also somehow different themselves. And for the rest? I’m just guessing here, but maybe it’s good to take people out of their comfort zone (maybe just a trip?) so they can become aware of the fact that the world is different, but so are they, depending on the context.
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Lousie Derman-Sparks has recently published a book for educators called ‘What if All the Children Are White?’ about anti-bias work in schools. I haven’t read it yet, but I really respect Derman-Sparks’ work (which has had a profound effect on my philosophy as an educator) and have benefited from everything that I’ve read by her so far.
Well, I applaud the author for the main point that that even white folks who don’t live in diverse areas can and should be actively anti-racist.
But to be constructively critical, what is lacking for me in this post is an awareness that in this country, places don’t become all-white by accident. Racist discrimination led to the creation of all-white neighborhoods and no doubt institutional racism is perpetuating the all-white community at a time when the US has unprecedented diversity. Chances are good that there are some biases against people of color perpetuating that all-white community.
So I am uncomfortable with the idea that “white people can’t help it if where they live is not diverse”. In my opinion, that is not true. I used to live in an all-white area. I moved. Living in an all-white neighborhood is a choice. And while I am sure that some people could develop anti-racist attitudes in the absence of contact with people of color, I wonder how they would get accurate and genuine information?
Good intentions aside, I think it is reality that it is challenging for any white person from Whiteville NOT to be ignorant of the real lives of people of color, or to live in an all-white community without internalizing some racist biases.
SF Mom:
I totally agree that areas have not been or become all one ethnic group by chance. There has been housing discrimination first by law, then by systemic policy, then “de facto” for literally centuries.
BUT not everyone has the ability to get up and move. Not everyone has the financial security to change a job, an apartment, or a house. There have to be other ways for people, white or otherwise, to be antiracist.
Right now I’ve living in a relatively diverse section of a borough (white, Latino, Pacific Asian, Indian Asian, but very few African-Americans), but the minute I go outside of my neighborhood and especially the borough, the diversity drops off in favor of a white majority. I can’t afford to live in the most diverse areas (the Philadelphia city wage tax would kill us), and my husband and I moved to where we are now for a job of his that didn’t work out, leaving us stuck. I hate the fact that the local church where I should be attending is incredibly pale and incredibly boring (not saying those 2 go together). Instead I try to travel 30 minutes one way to our old church, which means I don’t get there as often as I want to.
This is coming from 2 ethnic minorities – we WANT to live in a more diverse area. We’re stymied by a lack of savings, no home ownership, a transient job situation, and a small baby.
I think the fact that you can be anti-racist even if you grow up in a homogeneous area does not mean it’s going happen without effort. I grew up with mostly white and Asian-Americans in my school, but feel very fortunate that my parents had friends of different backgrounds and were very anti-racist themselves despite their own upbringing. Perhaps it’s the fact that my mom was Jewish or poor growing up so felt different in her own way. I just think it makes it easier to cross that line from not being racist to actively being anti-racist if you can have people from all races, cultures, etc. as friends, co-workers, etc.
it all depends on the individual really
i don’t think sending a kid to a mixed school accomplishes anything
i went to a mixed school and hated it but i know a lot of white kids that fit in just fine
my parents aren’t racist either
BUT i also knew a lot of white and black kids that were a backlash of this
if you remember anything about childhood you should remember that kids will find something different about you and exploit the hell out of it
i just flat out didn’t fit in
sorry for the double post
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Like any situation, it largely depends on the school. I teach at an independent school which is a member of the National Association of Independent Schools, and for many years, NAIS has advocated for its member schools to work towards inclusivity and multiculturalism. While there are NAIS schools which have much work to do, many others are well on their way, and are models of what schools can and should become. Thus, schools need to be intentional in their anti-racist efforts with students, faculty and staff, parents and the Board of Trustees.
What we don’t talk about is that the ignorance and prejudice can be as rampant in a predominately Latino or African American school, and so, the work needs to take place in those settings as well.
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You ought to call your site ‘White guilt’ because the issue of racism crosses all color lines and does not abide among one race. All you succeed in doing is perpetuating a myth and continue the divide. As long as a person wakes up in the morning and addresses everything that effects them by the color of their skin, they’re going to be hypersensitive to perceived wrongs. Skin color is just that, skin color, it’s superficial, it doesn’t effect anyone except those whose lives are focused upon that for their existence. People are going to be wronged in life. What matters is the character of the individual. My wifes ancestors were French Huegonots that were martyred to the point that only one survived the systematic slaughter. Is she now supposed to be demanding reparations and apologies from the French? That’s absurd as well as it is to demand it today for any group, race or whatever. As long as individuals hold onto their hate and misperception of another race they only hurt themselves and that goes the same for this site that is based upon guilt, not solutions. The bottom line is that all races have racists and pointing the fingers at one or another only serves to divide. Grow up and be thankful of our God given differences and move forward or be stuck forever in the past.
I grew up in a white school- predominantly white neighborhood and attended a white
church. Usually, it was just “understood” that
we didnt live with other races. It was just
better that way – they had their perspectives
on family lifestyles, roles, mannerisms, customs, beliefs, and we had ours. It is more than a color thing.
Never experienced prejudice until I taught in an all black school. then, I had white person call me an N -school teacher.
But that was in the deep south – never encountered prejudice until then.
Another experience I had was while
teaching in a native amer. village.
I had admonished some children for
throwing rocks at our school bldg. &
they turned and chunked rocks at me and
my children.
I admit that in college, I had all white teachers and the one time I had the “chance”
of having a teacher of another race, I changed classes – it was just another way to
preserve what I had been accustomed to – never considered it prejudicial – just a means to keep consistent in my life what I knew. Had done work among other races via
church ministry – was nice, but never considered having to change my culture for theirs – which seems to be what our society today wants us white people to do – to bend over backwards to be “like hispanics” or to be “like blacks”.
If God had wanted me to act like them, or to adapt to their ways, He would surely have made me that way. But I was born white and have the caucasian culture flowing through my veins.
While learning about different cultures is interesting – their foods nice to try -
I especially have loved Mexican tacos.
or listening to their songs –
I am loyal to who I am –
a 20th century white American, Christian
with pro-Israel stand – pro-life
Yes, we can have exchange, we can work together in our “diverse society” which has been legislated upon us by the New World Order – but God knew the wisdom of us having our own sets of cultures and diversities to appreciate among ourselves and for visitors to appreciate while visiting us. While God was and is creator of us all,
He knew what He was doing by having us
born into our own cultures.
Now Moses was sent to another culture to be saved from an untimely death – later, he turned out to be a leader and helped save his own kind (Israelis) from the Egyptians who had raised him. In the middle of this,
he had married a woman of dark skin,
which brought prejudicial talk against him
even by persons of his own family. But G’d
doesn’t like that kind of talk – nor of disrespect to one He had chosen to lead -
and so punishments were in order.
From these lessons from true life experiences, we can know that there are times the Lord G’d thought intermarriage among races was good and ok with HIM.
If G’d be for it – we best not be against it.
However, note , that the children of Moses
were raised Israelis and NOT like the
culture or religious beliefs of his wife.
The KEY here is : faithfulness to the
beliefs given to Moses by G’d – keeping of the
covenant with the Israeli people & their G’d.
The only true way to make “as one” all the cultures is through the indwelling Holy Spirit
but this does NOT mean subjugating our own
culture underneath the culture of another group or giving up our cultural ways to that of another.
Only G’d can truly make us echad – one people. It will never come about by governmental legislation or military power.
Some of the most beautiful people are those born of mixed races – these have the genes of
more than one race in them – some of my relatives are of same –
For them, truly to find the best values, the
best mannerisms, the highest standards in both cultures is a challenge – but a worthy one. For them, we are in most challenging times, where I have witnessed to persons of
black, white, asian, hispanic orientation
each in his own, proffer to “straighten out
America” by their dealing with them in
unrighteous fighting. Even from the internet,
we see and hear of extremist racial groups making threats to others – Those who are
of mixed descendency will have split loyalties and very difficult times – unless they are indwelt by the Holy Spirit and echad with the body of Jesus Christ.
the ONLY cultural adaptaions I would prefer would be the adaptation into my life of the
festivals and feasts which Yeshua kept – and this is only because He did them – and some of them we will still be celebrating after He returns [ Yeshua is Hebrew for Jesus]
If I had my life to live over, it would also be
that when the woman comes into her”time”,
that she is left alone by her husband, and has
help with her normal responsibilities during that week so she could rest – for all of our
“liberations” for women – we still don’t have
respect for our “time of fragility each month”
and for proper rest during pregnancy and
after childbirth – a major reason I believe for
stress among children today.