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1. WHY I HATE EVERYTHING | the Hathor Legacy on 29 Nov 2008 at 12:23 am

   [...] the thing is, this is not about some tragic interior monologue. Anti-Racist Parent has set up an open thread to discuss the recent case in Claremont, CA. The children of this Cali town have become the [...]

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1. Gunfighter wrote:

   OK, I’ll start.

   My question is: Did the schools make any effort to do some research and figure out what the native Americans of that period would have actually worn? Was there any effort at historical accuracy?

   Additionally, do native Americans react to dressing as native Americans from certain periods in the same way as, say I would about someone wearing blackface?

   Posted 28 Nov 2008 at 9:45 am ¶

2. Corinne Lightweaver wrote:

   To deal with the dilemma of Thanksgiving, I decided to create a new holiday: Maize Day. Here’s an excerpt: “This holiday began as a small research project through which I intended—with my family—to commemorate the United States holiday of Thanksgiving through the viewpoint of the indigenous people. The indigenous story of Thanksgiving, however, is one of heartbreak and while this story is an important one to tell, I began to understand more clearly that—instead of focusing on the ills done to native peoples—I wanted to create a holiday to focus on the wonders and victories of Native Americans. What mattered most to me was that these cultures be celebrated as living cultures.” You can read more about Maize Day at garretandstudio.wordpress.com; see “Maize Day: A Holiday for All Americans” and “An Annotated Bibliography for Maize Day.”

   Posted 28 Nov 2008 at 10:33 am ¶

3. Anonymous wrote:

   This is marginally related to the issue just introduced, but part of something more general that’s been on my mind lately.

   I am increasingly wondering, and trying to keep from sinking into despair, as I ask myself the question, “What is the role of people of color in anti-racism?”

   We can tell our stories of pain and frustration and betrayal over and over again. We can vow to raise our children in a multicultural environment. But it seems more and more evident to me that the dismantling of institutional racism requires the broad participation of white people—the white people running the media, government, schools, companies…etc. I’m tired of the success of my work depending on educating and ministering to white people who don’t want to hear the message and will do everything in their power to ignore it.

   I know, I’ve heard, I’ve told myself many times that this is a long journey, one that won’t conclude in my lifetime. And I know there are signs of progress, the election of Barack Obama being one of the greatest examples. But does anyone share this feeling of powerlessness at being a person of color trying to explain racism? What do you do about it?

   Posted 28 Nov 2008 at 9:48 pm ¶

4. Pollyanna Sunshine wrote:

   What I just don’t understand about the Claremont controversy is why some parents are so outraged at the costume tradition being discontinued. I mean, how much value does dressing up in a faux-Indian (or faux-Pilgrim) costume have anyway? What do people feel they are losing? I can maybe understand that it might genuinely not have occurred to some of them that this kind of ethnic dress-up is offensive or hurtful (although in 2008, that still requires a stretch of my imagination), but I really don’t understand why, once this is explained to them, they’d be so anxious to hang on to it and so angry at those who raised the issue.

   Posted 29 Nov 2008 at 4:30 pm ¶

5. Claudia wrote:

   @ Anonymous: I also feel this same powerlessness at times and while I can’t begin to offer a definitive answer to the problem, I know that the alternatives – striking back in anger, withdrawing in bitterness, sinking into depression – is often much worse. I’m convinced that racism can/will only be dismantled one person at a time, by the people we interact with in our daily lives. Most of us won’t attract a crowd of 200,000 when we speak (like Obama) and it can be really exhausting – being compelled to “educate” others who are curious, fearful, insecure, or ignorant about issues of race. But I’ve discovered that in the process, I often take something away from the situation that is just as meaningful. Sometimes all it takes for me to combat that sense of powerlessness is to remember that my daughter is watching and learning from me and I want to be a good example. I don’t know if this helps, but you’re definitely not alone!

   Posted 29 Nov 2008 at 7:22 pm ¶

6. Claudia wrote:

   Howdy, Folks. I also have a dilemma that I’d love to get some feedback on. This is the first year that my little girl (2 and a half years old) has started to realize who “Santa” is and what he represents. (She noticed him at the Winter Wonderland at the mall the other day and starting asking questions.) We are African American, so how much should it matter that I’m bothered that this Santa is white? I’ve actually been considering traveling the three hours to South Dekalb Mall in Atlanta where they have a black Santa.

   For some reason I thought I would have more time to figure all this out. I try to think about how I felt as a child, watching the classic animated movies, reading Christmas stories, and yes, sitting on Santa’s lap for the yearly picture. I know that I internalized a lot of negative images about myself in relation to whiteness and “Santa” is such a pervasive figure this time of year, so I guess this explains my concern.

   In any case, I’d love to hear thoughts from others who may be in the same boat. And if you know of any good children’s books with non-white Santas or multicultural accounts of the holidays, I’d really appreciate it!

   Posted 29 Nov 2008 at 8:03 pm ¶

7. Ed wrote:

   Dressing up in a manner that suggests a race other than one’s own doesn’t ring as offensive to me, though I accept that perhaps it should. Feel free to educate.

   For me it would depend on the intent. And the use of stereotypes.

   My son once dressed up as a Pilgrim. He is neither Calvinist nor English, but nobody seemed to mind.

   Posted 30 Nov 2008 at 7:13 am ¶

8. Bex wrote:

   As for the Thanksgiving article, I think it’s pretty damned offensive to mock Native Americans with the types of costumes that these kids are dressing in. These costumes propel stereotypes and are a form of mis-information and mis-education which do an injustice to those children. I mean, seriously – paper feathers and tomahawks? What a load of crap.

   There is a huge difference between dressing up like that on Thanksgiving (which doesn’t make sense at all to me either) and doing something educational for these children – in which they talk about the Native Peoples that lived in the area that they now live in. If I were the teacher for such a thing, I would bring in a guest speaker or two from those tribes to talk to the children, which I think would give them a REAL experience that was culturally relevant to their lives.

   On sort of a tangent, here’s my deal with Thanksgiving: it’s a harvest festival. It was going on for hundreds, if not thousands of years before whites ever came to this country. Harvest festivals were practiced in almost all cultures – which makes sense, cause you would sit down and celebrate life by partaking of the bounty in the fields. So, when people say that the first Thanksgiving was in 1620 – between pilgrims and Native Americans, I think that’s just part of the mis-education that this school is also trying to propel. Harvest Thanksgiving was going on in Britain many hundreds of years before it ever got brought to this country. In China, this is the Moon Festival (that we often celebrate at my school for TCM). I am sure that many Native American groups had harvest festivals too – and that’s probably why having a feast at this time, in 1620, occurred by both parties – since it was going to happen whether they were together or not.

   So – I think Thanksgiving can be an event that is celebrated in a variety of ways, and that honors a variety of traditions. I think that it’s easy, now that we are getting farther and farther away from the agrarian societies that we once were, to lose our connection with seasonal events and to understand these holidays as being a vestige of an event that happened so long ago. In reality, this holiday has roots in something that was very easy to understand for farming peoples – the food is harvested at this time, and must be saved to get through the winter.

   Posted 30 Nov 2008 at 12:49 pm ¶

9. Bex wrote:

   Claudia -
   I am a white woman, but I have been working on building my son a collection of books, and so I hope that you might like some of these suggestions:

   ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas: by Rex Perry is fantastic. He illustrates it with a black Santa.

   Christmas Gif’: by Charlemae Rollins, Joseph Rollins, and Ashley Bryan is a book filled with poems, stories and recipes about Christmas time.

   Christmas In The Big House: Christmas in the Quarters: by Patricia C. Mckissack, Fredrick McKissack, John Thompson. This book is probably a little too advanced for your daughter right now, but it might be something you’ll be interested in the future.

   Posted 30 Nov 2008 at 1:24 pm ¶

10. PureGracefulTree wrote:

    (I’m Anonymous #3…I switched computers and didn’t notice that my name wasn’t saved)

    Thanks, Claudia. I agree 100% with what you said, and it does in fact help to feel that there are people out there who share my experiences (and the accompanying exhaustion) and remind me that it’s worth it. I guess I was just looking for a little support, and I got it.

    Posted 30 Nov 2008 at 2:07 pm ¶

11. Andrea wrote:

    I did a Thanksgiving story a few years ago about an older couple who had adopted a young girl. During the intervew, the child appeared wearing the paper headband, featuring construction paper feathers and American Indian symbols she had made in an arts class at school that day. The little girl and her adoptive parents were all white. The school was a local Christian school. Some of the kids dressed up as Pilgrims, some as Indians, and they had the traditional Thanksgiving program. I would say this is still not an uncommon Thanksgiving tradition. And, since American Indians are the largest minority group in the state, I’d also guess that there might have been a couple of Indian kids in the class who wanted to dress up as Pilgrims.

    When you ask why parents are resistant to abandoning this tradition and what they’re losing, I’d say that they are losing tradition, one of the founding American myths/stories, and something that is just plain fun for a lot of kids to remember. This appears like a bunch of politically correct professors with a major agenda coming in and trying to take away one more tradition and teach kids instead about how terrible their country is. I would guess that is what some of the opposing parents have been saying around the table. And since one of the parents who likes the tradition is American Indian, apparently the objections to the tradition are not universal.

    The Pilgrims and the American Indians coming together for the first Thanksgiving is an American myth, what everyone remembers long after they’ve forgotten the factoids they learn later on in school. Myths are very powerful. They tell us who we are as a people. And the Thanksgiving story is about American Indians helping to save the starving colonists by providing food for them. It’s not a negative story, even if the facts aren’t right and all of the terrible things that happened afterwards aren’t covered for kindergarteners. They DO learn some of those facts about specific tribes and the things that were done to them by white settlers a bit later in local schools. I’d be very surprised if they aren’t also learning those things in the California elementary.

    Posted 30 Nov 2008 at 5:06 pm ¶

12. Claudia wrote:

    @Bex: thanks for the book recommendations! I am going to look them up at Amazon right now.

    @PureGracefulTree: glad I could help!

    Posted 30 Nov 2008 at 9:50 pm ¶

13. Corinne Lightweaver wrote:

    If anyone is interested in learning more about the Claremont situation or about ways to support those on the frontlines there, you can join the Facebook group “Support “No Playing Indian” at Thanksgiving,” which gives updates and information.

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 12:25 am ¶

14. Jo wrote:

    Sorry all, I am just throwing myself a pity party I took all the great information on “Rethinking Thanksgiving” added new respectful craft ideas and trational games and packaged it with kids books written by Native Americans and gave all the information to my son’s preschool teacher. I took a day off work and brought in Native American food for the kids to sample. I really feel that I went above and beyond to prevent seeing a construction paper headbands with feathers on my son’s Mayan Indian head. It was all going so well until Wednesday before Thanksgiving when the preschool basically flipped me off by not only making the headbands but reading a book that was completely inaccuate about Indians and Thanksgiving. I am outraged and feel like I just got socked in the gut.

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 9:39 am ¶

15. Modernmommy wrote:

    @ Anonymous: I am a white person but am also discouraged at times when my white family “doesn’t get” racism no matter how many times I try to explain it to them. A very wise man, John McCain (Not the Arizona Senator) once told me to never give up because “They are listening” even if it seems like their not. That they respect me for my views even if they pretend like they don’t, and that one day “they will get it.” Something will spark and they will remember all the things I have said and they will finally get it. This gives me hope when I start feeling hopeless. I try and remember his words when it feels like they will never change and I start to see the progress that is already being made. Although it is small I can still see it.

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 12:20 pm ¶

16. Bex wrote:

    @Anonymous/PureGracefulTree – I was thinking about you last night and wanted to post a couple of thoughts here:

    I am a white person who has been affected by listening to the experiences of people of color. Because of this, I am trying to work hard on my own racism and speak out against it whenever I see it. Change happens with your words. There are white people who are helping to work against this, and they are helping because they have listened to your stories and put their own baggage down long enough to HEAR you. I’m not sure if you’ve seen this website, but I thought it might offer a little bit of hope:

    http://worknow.ning.com/

    Also, I know I do not receive the same bullshit responses that you do – being that I am white and have so much damned privilege – but I wanted you to know that I get tired too, but I have a reason to keep me going. I sat at our Thanksgiving table last week and listened to my sister in law tell me how her grandfather is not a racist even though he uses the “N-word” to refer to black people. My three-year old son was sitting next to me. Had he not, I’m not sure if I would have risked the drama, but since he was there, and he is going to grow into a white man, I made sure to start the discussion with my SIL – even though all of the other (all white) people slowly trickled away from the table and she got madder and madder as I tried to explain to her the difference between racism and bigotry and that her grandfather actually qualifies in both categories. I pissed off my family that night, I made most of them uncomfortable, but it was all worth it, because everytime I looked down on my right side, there was my 3-year old, with his big brown eyes, listening to every word that I said. He will work to change this. He will be a white male working to change this.

    I also wanted to say that in Damali Ayo’s I Can Fix It Training, she talks about the necessity of people of color, who are working towards ending racism, to really take care of themselves, to remember that you don’t have to educate white people, to train your white friends to react to racism in public when you are together so that it doesn’t always fall on you, and to just walk away when you are too tired – because you have to rest. I don’t know if you have a group that you can go to where you can talk about this stress, but if you can find one, that would be highly beneficial. If you can afford or trade for monthly massages or acupuncture, that would benefit you too.

    We know that black women with college educations have almost 4 times higher chance of having premature babies that don’t survive past a year – than white women with less education. We know that this is due to the racism that they suffer, because we saw those rates start to get better after the civil rights movement, and worse when the Reagan administration started cutting social services. We know that people of color are at much higher risk for health problems because of the racism they suffer. All of this can be seen in the Unnatural Causes documentaries.

    It is so important for you to get the rest and health care that you need and deserve. It is so important that you walk away when you can’t handle it – for your own health.

    Sending you some healing vibes, and know that you and everything that you do are loved and appreciated. It was someone like you that got me off my ass and motivated to do something about the state of racism in this country.

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 1:51 pm ¶

17. K wrote:

    Corinne Lightweaver, I couldn’t find that facebook group. Did it dissolve on November 28 or something?

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 1:54 pm ¶

18. Bex wrote:

    @ Andrea – In response to your comment, all I can think about is this post secret card that was posted on racialicious a few days back, so I figured I would pass it along and see what you think -

    http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3032/3058741637_ac605b6024.jpg

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 1:57 pm ¶

19. PureGracefulTree wrote:

    Thanks, Modernmommy. I have indeed heard people on this forum say things like “Even when I’m arguing, things sink in”, and that sounds like what you were saying about how people are listening even if they think they aren’t. And if I remember my own journey regarding my insensitivity to other racial groups (I used to think objection to Columbus Day was all a bunch of excessive PCness until I was educated about the TRUE history of our country), perhaps deep down I can find that compassion and patience. It’s just hard not to feel alone, particularly when one is the only POC in a group of clueless white people…the arguments seem to cut deeper because they feel personal. It’s good to have a place like ARP to be with others.

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 3:06 pm ¶

20. Modernmommy wrote:

    Ooops I meant to write “Jon” not “John”

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 3:18 pm ¶

21. Andrea wrote:

    Bex:

    My initial reaction? Very sad for the kid on the card and for the horror stories I’ve heard about the hurtful comments American Indian kids heard from the white kids in the community I grew up in and still do. But I still don’t see much wrong with the kindergarten Thanksgiving Day pageant, particularly since I would guess some of the little Pilgrims have no Pilgrim ancestors and don’t fit that stereotype either. I doubt the clothing is entirely accurate for either Pilgrims or the American Indians. I’m sure they’ll learn about different Indian tribes and the more challenging history when they’re a little older.

    From what I’ve seen, the schools here have done a much better job of teaching about American Indian tribes than they used to. The kids go on field trips to pow wows and the Lewis and Clark museums, play traditional games at the Native American cultural week at the college, have American Indian speakers, and usually have American Indian classmates. I grew up 7 miles from a reservation and never learned much of anything about the history of that tribe until I was in college. On the other hand, I saw my American Indian classmates mainly as people, some troublemakers who threatened to beat me up on the playground and some academic nerds who made me feel really dumb when we were doing experiments in science class. I knew American Indian culture was alive and well. Maybe other states need to have more education during the rest of the year about American Indian tribal history and what local tribes are doing now.

    Posted 01 Dec 2008 at 8:08 pm ¶

22. Laura wrote:

    PureGracefulTree,
    I am not a person of color and really do not know where you are coming from. I can only imagine. I wanted to say thank you for your efforts against racism. You and people like you have made it possible for me to begin the painful journey of introspection and growth. I know when I was growing up there was never any sort of a resource like the information on this site. (or computers, ha)
    I am sorry that it is your burden to carry. I appreciate your efforts and I will help whenever and wherever I can. I know this is of no consolation but wanted you to know.
    Laura

    Posted 02 Dec 2008 at 11:43 am ¶

23. PureGracefulTree wrote:

    Bex and Laura, thank you so much for your words. Bex—I was particularly touched by your account of the Thanksgiving dinner and how you knew you were doing something important for your son. Laura—it is in fact a consolation simply to hear white people say, “I hear you, and I’m going to help fix this.” So many people sink back into their privilege, choosing to ignore racism because they can.

    I know it’s a long fight. And I guess what frustrates me is that I’ve read all the stuff about needing to take care of myself (including the Damali Ayo piece) and I hate how that “taking care of myself” IS my job, that I don’t have the power or credibility that a white anti-racist would. It’s encouraging to know that there are those who do have the power and are willing to use it. Maybe I just need to hang out here at ARP and Racialicious for a while and be supported, away from all my other organizations rife with institutional racism.

    Posted 02 Dec 2008 at 1:38 pm ¶

24. Rosa wrote:

    PureGracefulTree – I just want to repeat what Bex & Laura said. I’m another white antiracist. I had backslid a lot from being actively antiracist, resting on my privilege to be silent and working on my own internal bigotry. But reading the various feminist and antiracist POC blogs I’ve found over the last year or two has really gotten me moving again.

    We’re out here, listening, and learning. Thank you for that opportunity.

    Posted 02 Dec 2008 at 3:59 pm ¶

25. Bex wrote:

    PureGracefulTree -
    This is really powerful for me: “And I guess what frustrates me is that I’ve read all the stuff about needing to take care of myself (including the Damali Ayo piece) and I hate how that “taking care of myself” IS my job, that I don’t have the power or credibility that a white anti-racist would.”

    I’ve been thinking about this for the last couple of hours. It’s not right that white people hurt you and then it’s your job to pick up all of the pieces of yourself and put them back together. I am sorry for that and I will speak out against this at every chance I have. I do hope that you know how valuable that work is though – because taking care of yourself in all of this is taking care of your power.

    I know that you aren’t listened to by white people and that’s BS – but I want to ask you about power and credibility. Do you only have those things when white people listen to you?

    It’s hard for me, because I am white and I want to have this conversation with you – but I cannot empathize with your experience, since I have not had it myself. What I have had is the experience of being a woman in this country, and so that’s what I can draw from. I know that men hold power over me in many cases and I know that they have more privilege than I do. I know that when I try and speak up for gender equality in a room full of men, I am made to feel as if I am just bitching again and “playing the victim.” It makes me feel pretty powerless to change the larger picture.

    But, I see that I have power with other females, and I see that as the most important power. I believe that we are underprivileged (as women) partially because so many of us stand for it, or don’t know that we are being taken advantage of when we are. I find it empowering to speak to groups of women and to young girls and to point out to women when they have been mistreated and let them know that’s not okay and that they deserve better.

    So – I know this isn’t the same, because it’s a helluva lot easier for women to take back power when they are 50% of the population. This is not the situation that exits with you – I know. So, in an attempt to understand more (though please don’t feel the need to answer this question) I am just curious about this power and credibility and whether you feel like you can get this by talking to other people of color or not. Does this power and credibility only happen when you have changed the mind of a white person, or a group of white people?

    Posted 02 Dec 2008 at 10:11 pm ¶

26. Max wrote:

    I know this is getting off course just a bit, but written above it says, “Why is it so difficult for people to see the offense in masquerading as someone of another race?”

    I certainly understand wishing my child had a black Santa to visit and agree that they should be available, but I don’t see how that is any different than white people dressing up as a black character (not in a Halloweenish way, but actors, plays, etc.)

    Any thoughts on that or the larger issue of dressing up as a different race for plays, movies and such?

    Posted 03 Dec 2008 at 10:03 am ¶

27. PureGracefulTree wrote:

    Hi Bex,

    Thanks for your thoughtful question and for the obvious reflection you have already done. There is a quote I like (don’t know the source, sorry): “The soul does not need to be fixed. The soul needs to be heard.” And I do feel heard by you.

    I think you distilled my point perfectly when you ask whether I have power and credibility only when white people listen to me. I guess that is how I feel. In pretty much all the places I interact with others, it’s white people who are in positions of leadership, who have the decision-making power. More globally, it’s white people who control the mass media, who run the Fortune 500 companies, who hold most of the political power. And a major part of my personal journey into anti-racism involved the white minister of my former congregation refusing to address blatantly anti-Asian comments, telling me that it would cause more of a problem to call attention to such remarks than simply to let them go.

    So yes, I do feel that change and progress depends almost entirely on educating those in power. When I’m with other anti-racist POC, I feel supported but not necessarily empowered. When I was a female graduate student in physics, I guess I did feel somewhat empowered mentoring women undergraduates, but I don’t know that I saw myself as an agent of change.

    Perhaps it really comes down to numbers. I haven’t yet been able to have discussions on racism in an environment where I’m not the only or one of very few POC. And so the choice seems to be between taking care of myself (which feels like doing nothing) and fighting for change at the expense of my physical and mental health. I wish I could find a way to work for change and take care of myself in the process. If you or anyone else has suggestions, I’d really appreciate hearing them.

    Posted 05 Dec 2008 at 2:47 am ¶

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