I sometimes put my name on the waiting lists for popular books at the library. I requested the book Raising Happiness by Christine Carter probably three or four months ago. I was #25 or #26 in line, and my turn finally came up just last week.
This is an excellent book, both for children and parents. I don’t know what the rest of you think, but I know very few parents who consciously raise their kids for happiness. Success, maybe, and confidence, maybe, but happiness? I think many parents view happiness as a fleeting kind of state, one which pales in comparison to more concrete goals like achievement or academic skills. I think Western cultures view happiness as more of a temporary state than a goal.
When motherhood takes a hit [Moms of Hue]
While talking to her I was struck again by all the silence and shame we have around idealized visions of what it is to be maternal, let alone “the perfect mom” (which we know doesn’t exist). What do we do with those feelings of disappointment when motherhood and our little angel aren’t what we were banking on? Is it just a phase sometimes? What happens when you fear it may be more of a life long disconnect?
When Mom is mistaken for the nanny [New York Times/Motherlode]
Nicole Blades, who writes the blog MsMaryMack.com, is getting distinct messages from outsiders, too. A media consultant now living in New Jersey, she is black, her husband is white, and, in a guest blog today, she describes how often she’s mistaken for the nanny. Like Monroe years ago, Blades is looking for words, ones that will set the record straight, strip bare well-meaning but hurtful assumptions, and reclaim her child as her own.
Why adoption hurts [John Raible online]
Watch this clip from a Korean TV morning show. It captures well why many adoptees feel that adoption is painful, even when we love our adoptive families.